Tag Archives: drinking

Driving Home

An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over. […]

Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick’s Day. Mick, the bartender says, “You’ll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy.”. Paddy replies, “OK Mick, […]

Old man Murphy

Old man Murphy and old man Sean were contemplating life when Murphy asked, “If you had to get one or the other would you rather get Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s? ”Sure, I rather have Parkinson’s”, replied […]

Can I blame it on Guinness?

Dublin’s Patrick O’Shea called his lawyer and asked, “Is it true they are suin’ dem der cigarette companies for causin’ people to git cancer?” “Yes, Patrick, sure is true,” responded the lawyer. “And now someone […]

The Leprechaun

An Irishman walks into a bar and asks for two beers. He then pulls a small green-skinned man out of his pocket and puts him on the counter. As he’s drinking one drink and the […]

An Irishman goes into a pub

An Irishman goes into a pub and orders three whiskeys. After he has put them on the bar, the barman says to him “That’s not like you, Paddy, you’re normally a Guinness man!” Paddy replies, […]

An American walks into an Irish pub

An American walks into an Irish pub and says, “I’ll give anyone $100 if they can drink 10 Guinness’s in 10 minutes.” Most people just ignore the absurd bet and go back to their conversations. […]

A man walked into a bar ..

A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say, “Nice tie.” Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty, except […]

25 Signs that Your Getting OLD

I received this today 1. You’re asleep, but others worry that you’re dead. 2. Your back goes out more than you do. 3. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks […]

Pickled Eggs and Beer – the danger that lies within

As I hearken back to my youth growing up in New Hampshire, I recall this one particular rather cold February morning of sub-zero temperatures and sharing a room with my older brother. Now said older […]

Confession

A guy goes into the confessional booth after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. There’s a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry […]

The Monkey at the bar

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he’s drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats […]

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