Tag Archives: wife

Mrs. Murphy

A sobbing Mrs. Murphy approaches Father O’Grady after Mass. He says: “So what’s bothering you?” She replies: “Oh, Father, I’ve terrible news. My husband passed away last night.” The priest says: “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. […]

Viagra

A woman asks her husband, ‘Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit and coffee?’ He declines. ‘Thanks for asking, but I’m not hungry right now. It’s this […]

Won a bass boat

A good old Alabama boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says, “What you gonna do with that. There ain’t no water […]

Medical Exam

This guy wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. The doctor started a thorough examination, but finally found nothing wrong with the man. When the examination was […]

Doctor

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, “And you are no good in bed either,” and storms out of the house. […]

Fly Hunting

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around holding a flyswatter. “What are you doing?” she asked. “I’m hunting house flies.” he responded. “Oh, have you killed any?” she asked. “Yep, […]

Shlomo was walking home late at night and

sees a woman in the shadows. “Twenty dollars”, she whispers. Shlomo had never been with a hooker before, but what the heck, its only twenty bucks, so they hide in the bushes. They’re in there […]

English, Irish and Scottish Wives Playing Golf

The Englishman’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear. “Good God, woman! Why […]

Adopted

My wife just found out that she was adopted and was devastated.. She kept saying why didn’t they want me?!

Naked

Murphy comes home unexpectedly at 3:00 in the afternoon. Mary is laying naked on the bed Murphy “Mary what you doing, lying there naked on the bed”? Mary “Murph, I have nothing to wear”. Murphy “What you mean you have […]

My wife walked in to the room when I was in the

middle of a furious argument with our son. When he ran out of the room crying, I said to my wife, “God, I wish that I’d used a condom now.”

Dippy Blonde Driver’s Test

Jim’s wife slammed the front door and slumped on the sofa. “How did your driving test go?”, he asked.

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