Can I blame it on Guinness?

Dublin’s Patrick O’Shea called his lawyer and asked, “Is it true they are suin’ dem der cigarette companies for causin’ people to git cancer?” “Yes, Patrick, sure is true,” responded the lawyer. “And now someone […]

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The Leprechaun

An Irishman walks into a bar and asks for two beers. He then pulls a small green-skinned man out of his pocket and puts him on the counter. As he’s drinking one drink and the […]

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An Irishman goes into a pub

An Irishman goes into a pub and orders three whiskeys. After he has put them on the bar, the barman says to him “That’s not like you, Paddy, you’re normally a Guinness man!” Paddy replies, […]

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The Doctor

An Irishman goes to the doctor, who after examining him says “You have some problems with your heart, but if you take these tablets, I think it will be okay. “So the doctor gives the […]

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Mrs. Murphy

A sobbing Mrs. Murphy approaches Father O’Grady after Mass. He says: “So what’s bothering you?” She replies: “Oh, Father, I’ve terrible news. My husband passed away last night.” The priest says: “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. […]

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An American walks into an Irish pub

An American walks into an Irish pub and says, “I’ll give anyone $100 if they can drink 10 Guinness’s in 10 minutes.” Most people just ignore the absurd bet and go back to their conversations. […]

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Top Salesman

A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes to a big department store looking for a job. The manager says, “Do you have any sales experience?” The kid says, “Yeah, I was a […]

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Teacher

A teacher asks her class, “If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?” She calls on little Johnny. He replies, “None, they all […]

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Good Manners

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners and asked her students the following question: “Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how […]

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Seven Cats

Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven.” Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats […]

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One of life’s little perils

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. She was not aware her 9-year-old son was hiding in the closet. When her husband came home unexpectedly, she hid her […]

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The difference if you marry a Canadian girl

The first man married a woman from North Carolina. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning.. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came […]

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